Christopher Walken: Have you ever thought. About? Adoption!

Tess Lynch: Thought about it how?

Christopher Walken: Tremendous! Amounts of homemade babies; they have no places. To go.

Tess Lynch: Homemade babies?

Christopher Walken: If you’ve seen, a baby, they’re — adorable!

Tess Lynch: Are you saying that I should adopt a child? I’m not in the market for that right now.

Natalie Portman: It’s a terrible thing, not adopting a baby when you could adopt one.

Tess Lynch: Then why don’t you adopt a baby?

Natalie Portman: I’m not getting into this with you.

Christopher Walken: Hey. Please, hold on. Natalie. I’ve been noticing — an attitude. Don’t? Disgrace yourself.

Natalie Portman: (gestures at Tess) She knows what this is about.

Tess Lynch: The adoption thing?

Natalie Portman: No. The vegan thing.

Tess Lynch: What vegan thing? What are you talking about? You think I hate vegans?

Christopher Walken: Hostility makes me unbearably uncomforta—

Natalie Portman: Look, it’s basically my cause, and when you demean my cause…

Tess Lynch: Demean?? I respect that it’s a personal choice!

Natalie Portman: Nothing is a personal choice! Every choice has consequences! Your choices affect basically everything! Everyone needs to make smart choices! [her cell phone rings] Can you please hang on?

Christopher Walken: Rude, I think, I’ve never seen the like, when a person can put a person in —

Tess Lynch: Chris, I’m sorry about this. You know how she can get.

Natalie Portman: Guys, I’m really sorry, my guru’s on the phone, and I have to run. I want to get the recipe for the wax beans. Next time?

[Tess and Christopher exchange looks as Natalie leaves]

Christopher Walken: Can I please offer you another? Kir? And then if at once we feel a chill…a fire, sure, it’s easy, I’ll light one.

Tess Lynch: Actually, I’d love a kir.