Kanye West: I find myself resenting Taylor Swift. There was a better way to handle that, you know? That’s not what Jackie O. would have done. There’s a certain grace —

Bono: Grace, mate?

Kanye West: I’m not saying I wasn’t wrong!

Bono: Jackie O. watched as her husband was murdered — the President —

Kanye West: Okay fine but the situation is that something unpleasant is happening; sometimes you just say, you know, what’s the best way to handle being a victim?

Aretha Franklin: Kanye, she just stood there!

Bono: I literally can’t imagine a better way to have handled it.

Kanye West [pointedly, to Bono]: For some reason I guess I just thought you’d understand.

Bono: And what is that supposed to mean?

Kanye West: Oh, nothing.

Bono: No, no, really. Please. Tell me. I’m a goddamn humanitarian.

Kanye West: I read the blogs, Bono, but you obviously don’t.

Aretha Franklin [tearfully]: Stop, stop, would you both just stop!!